Hey there, it’s John from Twisby Records, back again but this time with a twist. We’ve already celebrated the champions of NAMM 2024, but what about the not-so-great, the oddballs, and the downright “what were they thinking?” moments? Yes, amid the brilliance, there were a few… let’s call them “interesting” choices that had us raising our eyebrows, scratching our heads, or just laughing out loud. Let’s dive into the lighter side of NAMM 2024’s less-than-stellar reveals, with all the jokes and jabs included. Buckle up; it’s going to be a fun ride!
For those of you who would like to watch our video on this here it is:
The Hall of “Shame”: Counting down the biggest losers.
#5. Anybody that paid for a hotel, a flight, or their badge
So, you decided to splurge on NAMM 2024, hoping for the music tech equivalent of finding the Holy Grail but ended up feeling more like you’d paid for a VIP tour of your uncle’s garage band setup. The price of admission got you a front-row seat to… well, stuff you could’ve just Googled from the comfort of your home. It’s like buying a ticket to Disneyland and finding out all the rides are just VR simulations of waiting in line.
All in all, there were a few good new reveals, but other than that it was cram packed with what felt like a bunch of used car salesmen trying to sell you a 2001 Ford Mustang that they rolled the odometer back on to claim it was only used by some grandma who kept it garaged and only drove it to church.
From just the reskinning of old plugins, to just no new products at all. We believe Namm 2024 was just a complete brick. This was the first “We’re back” year, with all the supply chain issues fixed, and the restrictions a few years moved, we were expecting something GROUNDBREAKING, and with the exception of PK Sound, there wasn’t really anything at all to write home about.
Next year, save your cash. Buy a lottery ticket, or better yet, invest in a startup that’s trying to invent time travel. That way, you can skip ahead to NAMM 2025 and see if it’s worth attending before you even spend a dime.
#4. The people of Anaheim
Content creators at NAMM 2024 faced the ultimate boss level: trying to upload content with the bandwidth equivalent of a potato connected to two tin cans. Anaheim’s internet infrastructure apparently decided to take a vacation, leaving streamers and uploaders in a digital desert. If “loading… loading… failed” was a drinking game, we’d all have been under the table by noon.
Every live stream we found was just a garbled, unwatchable, pixelated mess. Part of this I’m sure was Disneyland parents trying to stream their kids puking up the $30 hot dogs they bought them while riding space mountain, but the amount of content creators that, AI, home studios, and limited incomes have created HAS gotten ridiculous. You know it’s ridiculous….. because we even do it now. Having 100+ content creators running around trying to show booths, but only hocking their newest guru class or “plugin presets” made the broadband absolutely TANK. So to the residents of Anaheim, I am genuinely sorry that you couldn’t make the time pass at work by scrolling tiktok and watching cat videos.
Dear Anaheim, for 2025, maybe let’s not have the internet powered by the same technology that runs my grandma’s pacemaker. Our live streams thank you in advance.
#3. Dolby Atmos: Missed the Bus
All Aboard the Hype Bus… or Not
Dolby Atmos decided the best way to showcase cutting-edge spatial audio technology was… a bus. Not software, not a demo track, but a literal bus. It’s like showing up to a gourmet chef competition with a microwave and a frozen dinner. Sure, the John Lennon Educational Tour Bus is cool, but when you’re expecting the “future of sound”, getting a set of wheels instead feels a bit like unwrapping socks on Christmas morning.
Now we have our own thoughts about Atmos in music (and they aren’t good), but if Dolby and Apple are gonna cram this down our throats, and have every soundcloud rapper with just a 2-track and 60 ad lib tracks blowing up our dms for an “ATMOS MIX” ….. at least show up.
I dunno how you miss the bus this bad when you brought your own…… smdh
#2. Schecter Guitars
Schecter and Machine Gun Kelly teamed up to create what can only be described as the love child of a guitar and a questionable fashion statement. It’s like they were going for “edgy” but ended up with “edge-lord of the middle school dance.” This guitar had us wondering if it was designed for playing music or auditioning for a role in a sci-fi B movie as the villain’s weapon of choice.
Note to Schecter: Next time you want to make a statement, maybe just release a new color. Neon green, perhaps? Less is more unless you’re into guitars that double as conversation pieces… or potential alien artifacts.
#1 Fender’s Deluxe “What Now?”
Fender, oh Fender, decided what we really needed was not another legendary guitar but a… guitar amp stand. And not just any stand – a Deluxe Wooden Guitar Amp Stand. For when your amp insists on only the finest in mid-century modern furniture. It’s like they mistook NAMM for an IKEA showroom. At $299, it’s perfect for the guitarist who has everything, including too much money and a peculiar obsession with amp elevation.
Jokes aside Fender, I think it’s great you picked up a new hobby during the “Blip” of 2020. And while making furniture is great….. using this as the big reveal for a show as large as Namm …… well, …. fire your whole team at this point.
Maybe next year, let’s stick to what you do best: instruments that play music, not furniture that just… stands there. Unless it comes with a built-in butler to tune my guitar, I’ll pass.
There you have it, folks – NAMM 2024’s not-so-finest moments, served up with a side of sarcasm and a sprinkle of jest. While we all love pushing the boundaries of music and tech, sometimes it’s okay to look back and laugh at the missteps along the way. After all, it’s these “What the heck?” moments that make the journey all the more memorable.
Here’s to the innovators, the risk-takers, and yes, even the misfires. Because without them, we wouldn’t have nearly as much to talk (or joke) about. See you at NAMM 2025 – we’ll be the ones eagerly waiting to see what surprises (good, bad, or bewildering) await us. Cheers to more music, more technology, and yes, more laughs.
